You’ve read all these murder mysteries of one kind and another from grisly hard-boiled noir to the sweetest cozy. You’ve seen all the tricks and seen how the detectives unravel a Gordian Knot of a story to solve the murder. You let your mind out to play imagining the Perfect Murder.
Just to pass the time while you’re sitting there fuming in a traffic jam, you pick out that daffy blonde in the BMW in the lane next to you who’s putting on eyeliner while talking on her cell phone. Grrrrr.
We’ve read of course that the hardest murders to solve are those in which killer and victim have no discernible connection. You whip out that gun that suddenly appeared on the seat beside you. (This is just fiction, remember.)
You’ve never seen that woman before. But what if somebody remembers you fuming and the dirty looks that blonde got, and the way you cut her off when a lane opened in front of her. Just suppose they were trying out a new camera and saw you speed away. Or there’s a freeway camera you never saw.
Let’s face it, you’re no hardened criminal. If you got away in the chaos of a traffic accident when she ploughs into cars beside her, you watch the news that night. How could she be old enough to have four children and a mother dependent on her? How could she be a choir director? A veteran?
Your own mind turns on you. You sweat, you dream, you listen for the knock at the door. A patrol car pulls up behind you at a stop light and you want to get out, fall to your knees and confess just to make it stop. It’s human nature to want to confess.
Once they get you in the interrogation room, you’re gonna fold up like a beach chair anyway. Law enforcement professionals break down people like you and me every day. One’s sweet; the other one scares you to death. Even when you know it’s a Good Cop/Bad Cop routine what’s human in you looks to find an ally, someone who understands you.
It’s fun to consider, but I don’t advise going any further than reading this when considering the Perfect Murder. You’re not the type.